Women Food and God

Taking to the bookshelf to try and figure out this whole eating crappy food thing I seem to be really good at.
Geneen Roth’s Women Food and God has been on the shelf for a while now. I read the intro, probably checked my FB and never got back to it. Yeah, I do that. Often.
Anyway, I started it last night, because recently, I’ve been drawing closer to God, and food most weeks and ya know I’m a gal, after all. I read about 30 pages, before passing out. Reading makes me sleepy. Anyone else?
Today, I’ve read a few more pages and so far I just feel like she’s spent 50 pages trying to convince me that my weight has little to do with food. I already know that.
Although, I have rabbit-earred (yep, it’s a word) some eye-opening sentences:
– “I shut myself down or walk out the door when pain threatens to destroy me – which is in any situation that involves another human being or whose outcome I cannot control.”  Agree. I don’t do well when I don’t understand things or lack knowledge of what’s happening/going to happen in the future.
– “Either you want to wake up or you want to go to sleep. You either want to live or you want to die.” Again, agree. Of course, I want to live, but Roth is helping me understand my actions prove otherwise. Heavy stuff.
– “Food is only the middleman, the means to the end…of making yourself numb. Of creating a secondary problem when the original problem becomes too uncomfortable.” I will often look forward to a meal and somehow I foolishly believe that it will soothe any problem.
– “Weight is what happens when you use food to flatten your life.” O.K. I’d love for Buns on the Run to be all happy-go-lucky and all, but being overweight comes with baggage – emotional luggage that has to be dealt with, and I intend to deal with it along this journey. I won’t gloss over the internal mental/emotional fight that goes along with the physical one. It’s all tied together, I believe.
Having said that, I must say this statement floored me. For reasons I have yet to discover, I “have given up without saying so.” Roth nails it here. No coincidence that I put the book down to blog right after this passage.I didn’t eat well today. I had a Luna Bar, half a chocolate chip cookie that smelled of chemicals and Sonic. I don’t need to list out the items from Sonic. It’s Sonic. ‘Nuff said. I haven’t worked out yet this month. Truth be told, I’m struggling mentally in a big way this week. Ugh is the only emotion I can pen to paper. But hey, Blogging Success today. Day 2 done.
*Bolded sentences from Geneen Roth’s Women Food and God.

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