The best way to start this post is for you to read this article. Yes, it’s long and harsh, but read it and watch the clips that correspond with his points. Why? Because it’s necessary and sets the tone to the rest of my point. A buddy of mine posted that today and within minutes of reading the last sentence, I logged back into this here ole blog and decided to let it inspire me.
After reading this, I had an epiphany of why I’ve abandoned this blog.
1. I don’t DO anything.
2. I am too worried about what other people think.
3. My skills are inferior.
OK, those are broad generalizations, which are untrue some days. And let me be clear, this is not a plea for cheerful comments of how wonderful you think I am. These are facts of truth as I see them to be. These are my overall realities.
These are at least the three main reasons I’ve stopped blogging, writing, creating. Though, I’m certain there’s more behind it.
I don’t do resolutions (a cliché I’ve seen too many times in the past two days). Even more cliché, I pick a word for the year. I totally believe in setting a tone or a theme and striving for it.
Last year, the word was CHANGE and it worked.
I’ve been mulling over my 2014 word and the only word that kept creeping in was SERVE. Lord knows best that this is the best word for me to have. Then, I read Wong’s article, which made me think of how lazy I am. Therefore, this year’s word is DO. The way I see it, DO will encompass me getting off my ass AND SERVING others. So, I’m gonna DO. I’m gonna DO the mess outta 2014. (Insert all naughty jokes here.)
Because what the hell am I doing with this life if I ain’t gonna DO anything.
Part of that DOING will be this blog. I’ve already admitted I’m clueless when it comes to designing a blog – at times that means even posting pictures. But I’m so over letting lack of experience keep me from writing. And I’m convincing myself I don’t care about what anyone thinks about what I write. I’m writing. My material could get crass, silly and downright dumb, but it’s mine.
Like Wong says, “It’s incredibly comforting to know that as long as you don’t create anything in your life, then nobody can attack the thing you created.”
I’ve operated WAY TOO LONG on that premise. I’m gonna DO some creating. My hope is that tons of people love it, hit like buttons, leave comments and wanna pay me to write. If I don’t write, that can’t happen.
In all honesty, I feel like a waste of space in various aspects of life. Sadly, it’s a condition many people struggle against, yet are forced to hide by creating a seemingly perfect world full of beauty and productivity.
If I do anything with this blog, I aim to fight against all the BS of modern thinking. I want to talk about things most people won’t. I’m a firm believer we are here to connect. Yet, connection on a deeper level is severely endangered.
This is how 2014 will roll. DOING something. Who knows what that something will be. In my head, it’s SERVING my husband, growing closer to God, continuing to learn how to cook, RUNNING!!!!, getting back to the mat, reading…all the same stuff just a new attitude. I am totally throwing myself at this New Year. Just gonna get up and DO anything, everything.
“Because in my non-expert opinion, you don’t hate yourself because you have low self-esteem, or because other people were mean to you. You hate yourself because you don’t do anything. Not even you can just ‘love you for you’.” – David Wong